Don’t Laugh News Challenge: George Clooney Won’t Leave Trailer

(upbeat sting) – [Announcer] From West
Hollywood, California, the only news team that doesn’t know what’s on the teleprompter
before they read it. Anyone who laughs or breaks loses points. This is Breaking News. – Welcome to Breaking News, the news show where we don’t
know what we’re about to say, and we aren’t allowed to smile or laugh. I’m Stephanie Meat. – And I’m Daddy (laughs) (everyone laughing) Tonight we’ll be investigating
a slew of home break-ins on Maple Lane, and why
I smell like piss today. – It’s because I pissed on your suit. In other news, local eight
year old Jessica Nodad won the local Miss
Bumblebee Girlboss Pangeant. She now moves on to the state competition, where she will be competing
against 12 other little idiots. – Now, Stephanie, I don’t know if you can call them that. – Sorry, 12 other idiots.
– Thank you. (hosts laughing)
In local sports news, the Cabin John High School football team beat their rivals the
Damascus (bleep) 2-0. You might be thinking that 2-0 sounds like an unusual score for football, but remember, football is stupid. A touchdown is worth six
points because (bleep) – I have to interrupt you there, Daddy, we’ve got breaking traffic news coming in. For that, we turn to our
traffic reporter, Wet Daniel. Wet? – A terrible scene here downtown. A truck full of maple syrup
crashed into a vet clinic on Sunset and Diane Lane. Drivers are being told to avoid the area unless they wanna’ see a
bunch of sticky lizards and icky gizzards, fickly drizards, and straight up dead dogs. We have reason to believe the truck driver was distracted
at the time of the incident. Yelping for the wettest soups in the area. We’d recommend taking the long way around. Take I-95 north and just keep going. Just drive and drive. Find a new town. Settle down there. Don’t come back until your kids are grown. Or, if that’s too long, you coward, you can always take my shortcut, Tokyo drifting on the sidewalk. Back to you, Daddy. – Thanks Wet, sounds dangerous, but I gotta say, Wet’s always early and blood can be cleaned off your fender. – Great stuff. Well, it’s summer, and that means beating the heat in movie
theater air conditioning. – Movie theaters, a winning combination of uncomfortable seats, expensive snacks, and freezing cold temperatures. – Our film critic Buzz Aldrin sat down with a local filmmaker to hear about the production
scene around town. – Thanks, guys. I’m film critic Buzz Aldrin. I was the second person
to walk on the moon, but let’s not get bogged down in that. I’m here with Mary-Ellen Blankets, who just made her first
movie right here in town. – Thank you for having me. – Your movie is called ABBAtar, and it used the music
of ABBA to tell a story about a distant planet
filled with unobtanium mines. – Yep. – Tell us about the plot. – Well, it’s easy. First of all, there’s only, anybody who knows ABBA, you know about it, so they’re, I don’t need to explain it, but basically, they’re a couple different, okay, so, we, you, like. – Something here. – Yeah, so you know, all your favorites will be there. It’s gonna’ be, it’s gonna’ be great. (everyone laughing) – When you say all your favorites, do you mean members from
ABBA or songs by ABBA? – Both! Most of the cast is, and
was, members of ABBA. We got a great location
to shoot, and we shot it. – That’s mostly what the
movie viewers are looking for. – And we shot it all there.
– Great. Well great, that’s fabulous. Now, George Clooney is in this movie. Tell us about all the
pranks he pulled on set. – Oh my gosh, he did this one prank where he wouldn’t come out of his trailer. It was so funny, we all kept laughing. I wasn’t there for that,
but I heard about it, I heard that it was really funny. And they were all doing
fun stuff like that. – Sorry, when you said they were all doing fun stuff like that but you weren’t there, that implies that other people were having fun pulling pranks but you were not there? – That’s, yep. – So as I said, I’m astronaut Buzz Aldrin, and on a personal note I’d like to know, how Earth’s moon plays into this film. – Well, Earth’s moon is actually, it’s sort of, it’s around, but it’s not, like, affecting the plot. In a way that’s real or hard. Like, it’s like, the
Earth’s moon is like there. (everyone laughing) The Earth’s moon is
there, and you can see it. Like, when you watch, when
you watch it at the beginning, you can see the Earth’s moon is there but it’s not affecting
the plot in a hard way. – So in a way it’s almost
like the moon is right now, where it just exists in the world, but it doesn’t have a whole lot of effect on our day to day lives. – Yeah, but it has a character name. The Earth’s moon’s character, it has like a name in my movie, whereas, like we just call it moon, cause it’s a moon. But in my movie we call it David. – Very good, well if
you gave the moon lines, what would they be? – Hey, I’m here too. – So to be clear, the moon as a character- – Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, I have a question about the traffic going to and from set. – By all means. – Was it bad? – Damn it, Wet, you
interrupt Mary-Ellen Blankets with, was it bad? What’s wrong with you? – I want to do more than traffic! Traffic is boring. – One of these days, Wet. Pow, straight to the moon.
– Or David! – Where I’ve been, or David. – I actually have an
interesting story about traffic. – Oh, well, if it’s
interesting, then by all means. – Basically, I was in my car, and I was driving, and there were cars in front of me and behind me. And people were going everywhere, like. Do you ever, ’cause sometimes I just think it’s so
interesting how, like, I look at traffic, and I’m like, people are going everywhere. – Yeah. – People are always going everywhere. – That is interesting.
– So. – That was interesting! (hosts laughing) – That’s it for us, but before we go we’d like to acknowledge
this week’s loser. Jess. Stephanie Meat. Thanks for watching! – I wanna’ hear more
about that traffic story! – Well, everybody goes
everywhere, if you think about it. – I wanna’ hear more lines from the moon. – [Announcer] Like what you just saw? Of course you do, you’re
an informed citizen. Well guess what? 10 more episodes of Breaking News will be available for you,
exclusively on DROPOUT. Go to and start
your free trial today. (host laughing)

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100 thoughts on “Don’t Laugh News Challenge: George Clooney Won’t Leave Trailer

  1. BREAKING NEWS: Sign up for DROPOUT for TEN more episodes, available WORLDWIDE!

    Become a member of our channel today [ ] for access to OUR ENTIRE DROPOUT LIBRARY (including full seasons of WTF101, Dimension 20, Um Actually, and more)!

  2. No joke when he said "how does the moon play a part in the film" my first thought was "well, you recall how I said we shot in lots of great places? The moon was actually one of them, like the actual moon, with the cast of Abba"

  3. Funny story about traffic. I hate it, and no I will not elaborate on the topic. Now excuse me while I pad run time by staring awkwardly at the camera.

  4. Come on guys. I get You tube is dying and all that but I feel like everything you put out is like a sampler for Dropout so we never get like the "full" content here. It just feels like an ad for ANOTHER streaming service and I don't have the time, effort, or money for that.
    I'm out.

  5. Stop falling back on improv for half of your script. 1 section is fine, but when you make one person improvise 3 or 4 times in a row, as a couple episodes have shown now, it just falls apart. Unless you know the person is capable of improv, just leave it out. It grinds the skit to a halt, and becomes borderline painful to watch.

  6. Wow, CH has gotten UNBEARABLE to watch!! If its not liberal fanatical bs its horrible unfunny n cringy content nowadays! Goodbye forever CH

  7. Ya way to go Raph.. i know u will be the only person who can beat Trapp and by the way Jess u r stunning as usual..

  8. sees (Improvise)
    "Oh no."
    sees that she could have the others rack up the points
    "Oh yeaaaaaaah."

  9. These segments were funnier when they were given almost gibberish to read. Trying to make them sound sort of like real newscasts ruins them and the improvising is just painful to watch. Personally, I found this boring and turned it off after a couple minutes.

  10. How did you manage to make this feel scripted, and unscripited at the same time? It's like you have moments of genuine wit, diluted by moments of scripted reactions. Everyone involved here should feel ashamed.

  11. Loved the first ones, but the all the “(improvise)” makes it bland. Constructive criticism. (I say as if it would ever be read)

  12. “Welcome to the show where you read unexpected funny things of a TelePrompTer and try to keep a straight face!” 3 minutes of improv

  13. These seem to be getting progressively less funny. Disappointing because the last season was hilarious. The improvising is okay, but shouldn't be used as a crutch. I'd love to see more writing and some outtakes from after they announce the loser. That was gold in previous eps!

  14. Omfg I’m just now noticing that there’s captions scrolling along the bottom of the screen, so Mary was improvising that entire thing

  15. I swear, if they gave me an (improvose) promt I would say a few intro words and then say "and also the writers of this very episode your watching can shove a microwave far up their asses for not giving me anything to work with."

  16. hello. my name is david. I am a moon and don't consent to my depiction in this film. my wife charon is adamant it might affect our childrens lives. its bad enough what you and the paparazzi did to enceladus. he barely vents any more

  17. I wish they wouldnt do the "improvise" bits as much for future sketches. I don't really like it but I love the rest of Don't Laugh News

  18. For the improve, I'd just string along all the random gibberish that popped into my head. Abbatar? Well, a man rides a bike on a potato farm. And aliens show up. They steal the potato farm. Then Daniel Craig eats an orange. But he does it really slowly with the peel on. Frosty guns down a bunch of dwarves and Rambo shows up with a machete to fillet some fish. Which is where Usain Bolt sprints so fast he goes back in time. And saves Emanuel Macron as a baby from mecha Hitler. Then it ends with a Bar mitzvah gone horribly wrong.

  19. I think they should point out the winner as well as the loser. Ralph only got one point, which is significantly smaller than the rest but he gets no mention.

  20. "Blood can be cleaned of your fender" he's right, my friend came to me with a blood covered guitar, only needed water to wash off.

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